We've just been sent a letter inviting us to the school Parent's Evening. Or rather we have been invited to apply for a five minute time slot between 3.30 and 6pm on one of two days. Then we are given two days' warning what slot we've got. Don't bring your child, on pain of death. Of course, the type of parent who cares what their child's teacher thinks of their little Einstein isn't going to be satisfied with five minutes, so there'll be endless wating around, I just know it. And 'the public' says that GP opening hours are inconvenient.

Yet still the next day the sheep were lining up, desperate to jump through the hoops.

Little 'Un has been at that school for six weeks of his four and half years of life. I'm tempted to jump through a hoop or two myself, just to see what his teachers can possibly tell me about him in five minutes that I don't already know. Not that tempted.